Sacred SPace | Dori Howard
Contributing Writer: Dori Howard
Each month The Story of Us features different changemakers on The Leader Path and in The House as they share their unique voice and perspective to positively impact the world we are co-creating together. Today's contributing writer is PowHERhouse AMPLIFY Coach and Enso Retreat Centre Owner Dori Howard who invites us to remember the importance of nourishing ourselves and shows us the staggering statistics of the cost of burnout.
Sacred Space
“True silence is the rest of the mind, and is to the spirit what sleep is to the body, nourishment and refreshment.” ~ William Penn
I love hosting people at Enso Retreat Centre. Retreat guests, couples on vacation or a quick getaway in the Treehouse, family gatherings, friends old and new, my daughter and her various groups, private retreats…all of it. I love preparing the house, getting rooms ready, planning meals and snacks, designing activities (including relaxing), and getting ready for guests to soak in the restorative vibes of this magical place. Preparing a room is more than just clean sheets and making the bed. Preparing the room is like preparing a sacred space. The resting space/ bedroom is like a sacred space and it all begins with making the bed.
Oddly, I started my career making beds. Nursing 101 prepared us for providing basic care. This included making the perfect bed WITH a patient in the bed or changing the bed between admissions. Back in the day, making a bed was an activity of pride. Those were the days before fitted sheets, mattress toppers, or mattress covers. The slippery vinyl of the mattress made for a tricky challenge but we mastered it proudly and dutifully. Making beds was a time of connection with fellow nurses as we methodically and rhythmically lifted the bed together, tucked in the sheets and crafted those tight corners. It was our time to catch up with each other, be present with the patient or reverently change the sheets while carefully shifting a sick patient from side to side.
It was more than just making a bed though. In the hospital, the bed is both a practical and a sacred space where everything happens. The daily habits of eating, elimination, sleeping, waking, playing, crying, laughing and dreaming occur all in the bed. It is also a brave space where painful procedures, treatments, and care happens. It is also a sacred place of prayer, healing, recovery and claiming it as a space of no harm. It is a place of beginnings, transitions and endings. As a nurse, I was acutely aware of holding and honouring this space that held the patient as they healed, recovered or transitioned.
In life, our bed is a significant part of our life. We may have been born there and may die in bed. It is a place of sanctuary to be alone, to journal, to cry, to claim as the only space that is truly our own. It is our space for solitude, relaxation and rest. We keep secrets there, allow ourselves to be the most vulnerable, and the space where we are at our truest self. We create life, make love, and sometimes are harmed in our bed. The bed holds a great significance in our lives.
Bookending my career, I am once again taking pride in preparing beds for guests. I notice the moments of this bedmaking ritual, taking pride in making the perfect bed, with line dried sheets (in the summer), crisply pressed pillow cases and a spritz of lavender linen spray to finish off the experience. As I make the bed, I think of the person who may be occupying this space, hoping they have a restful and restorative experience. I hope they sleep well and soak in the silence and stillness this island offers. For retreat guests, I hope they have a place to rest and digest the emotional deep dive they have taken during the day.
Here are a few tips to making the bedroom a sacred and restorative space:
- Remove TV’s, fitness machines and ideally, electronic devices. There are no TV’s in the bedrooms or common spaces by design. It would defeat the purpose of this oceanfront oasis. TV’s and electronic devices are distractions from the restorative experience. Need I say more.
- Invest in a super mattress. The comfort, the temperature, and the quality = a restful sleep.
- Make the space inviting and welcome. A small bouquet of flowers, local chocolates, soap from a local vendor all ooze of feeling cared for.
- Use a diffuser that loaded with an essential oil to calm, relax and soothe yourself.
- Enjoy a comfy robe!
- Have a glass of water by the bed
- Cozy slippers!
- Go to bed with a calming and soothing herbal tea.
A good night’s sleep is vital to our health and well-being. Give yourself a sacred space to rest and digest, restore and relax, reflect and inquire. Your sacred space awaits you.
Dori Howard is the owner of Enso Retreat Centre and is part of the PowHERhouse Amplify Relational Leadership Coaching team. Dori has a BScN from U of Alberta, an MA in Leadership and a Graduate Certificate in Executive Coaching from Royal Roads University. She is a licensed facilitator for Coaching Out of the Box and a member of the International Coach Federation, Institute of Coaching (Harvard Medical School) and the NeuroLeadership Institute. She is certified as a Trauma Informed Coach working with first responders and couples to overcome the impact of PTSD. Dori is also a Kundalini yoga teacher and integrates the ‘yoga of awareness’ into all realms of life. Dori currently resides on the unceded ancestral territory of the Hul’qumi’num and SENĆOŦEN speaking Coast Salish peoples also known as Salt Spring Island, BC. There she hosts intimate retreats, hikes with her compassion dogs, plays in the Coast Salish Sea and enjoys sunsets from her deck.
